6 Ways to be your own Best Friend

Hi Friends, sharing with you again in gratitude, my personal notes on the 3rd Talk of the Series: MAGNETIC by our Feast Builder Bro Dreus Cosio @ The Feast SM Santa Rosa, Cinema 1,  two weeks ago.  

Sorry for posting this late; I just had to accomplish a lot lately -- but  I don't wanna miss this chance because being a mother of three daughters, I dearly hope this would be something they can always go back to when they come to the RIGHT TIME of finding their "Mr. Right".  I sure do hope that this would also help a lot of parents out there while they fervently desire for their child's best future. 

SERIES:  MAGNETIC

How to Attract The Right Person Into Your Life

Talk 3: The Bond

When you try to look for the right person,

"Hanapin mo yong taong gagawin kang priority, hindi temporary."

Basically, both men and women -- some, if not all -- do not really know how to attract the right person in their life. 

Why? -- because people are getting confused in their love story and with the way they look at themselves.  

Unconscious as they are, there is that tendency to carelessly submit or comply with the  3 Laws of Romantic Attraction:

  

1st law

You don’t attract who you deserve.

You attract who you think you deserve.

Subconsciously, you see yourself in a very low way.   You've got to consider that your perception is your reality.  If you perceive yourself as somebody who is broken, you will be looking for another broken person. 

The perfect formula for a toxic relationship is a toxic self.

2nd law

You don’t attract who you want. You attract who you are.

A wounded person will attract another wounded person. An emotionally healthy person will attract another healthy person.

3rd law

You don’t attract how you want to be treated

You attract how you treat yourself.

Long before he treated her as garbage, she already treated herself as garbage.To her, abuse felt like love.

Broken people attracts broken people.  "If you don’t do the inner work to heal yourself, your unhealed wounds will attract another wounded person."

 "If you don’t heal your own wounds, you’ll go into a relationship, seeking for someone else to heal your wounds."

credits to http://www.lightfam.com/images/talkslides/Magnetic%203.pdf

You get attracted to many wrong people because you don't really think of your self too well.  

TO ATTRACT THE RIGHT PERSON, you've got "WORK ON YOUR SELF FIRST!"  Unless you have a healthy relationship with yourself, you’ll never have a healthy relationship with others.

Its ok for you to declare that you are wonderfully made.  You have to love yourself!

photo credits:  amendesigns.com

You've go to BE YOUR OWN BEST FRIEND! 

How? 

Here are these 6 WAYS  to be your own BEST FRIEND:

1. Forgive your faults.

    Imagine yourself at the end of the day and forgive yourself.

2. Fix your fences.

    Fix your defence system -- your boundaries.  Protect yourself from meanness. 

3.  Feel your feelings.

    All emotions are valid but not all expressions.  Affirming your feelings is respecting yourself. 

    Put a gap between emotion and expression. 

4. Focus on your fantasies.

    What do you picture in your mind? 

    Stop thinking about the bad stuff that's happening in your life.  

5. Follow your fun.

    Don't take yourself too seriously. "tumawa ka naman!" :) 

    Laugh more often! 

6. Find your flow.

    Go on, pursue your passion as a person!

    If you find your flow -- your "zone" -- you feel alive. 

                  

Go back to yourself.  Be comfortable with one thing in life -- be comfortable with God's love.

The bond simply means you have to fix your relationships at home by fixing your self first.  You have to love your self every day.  You have to feel good about yourself because  it all boils down on how you see yourself!

Bro Dreus concluded with this advice:

"Everyday, start declaring the wonderful characters that you are!  Couples as well, you could start to embrace your differences and start fixing your relationship."

Pwedeng may part ng buhay mo na hindi ka sanay

But you need to be comfortable in that place--- how? 

Magpamahal ka kay God.

Allow God to tell you how much He loves you! 

#sunset

"True Character is who you are and what you do -- even when no one is watching you!"

Let “our walk” lead!

Words would always define who uses it. Others are always curious whether what we say are congruent to what we do. ...don't you think so? 

Ang sapatos daw, bago mo ma-enjoy gamitin, ita-try mo muna kung swak sa pakiramdam mo! Isusukat, ilalakad-lakad, pakikiramdaman kung hindi ba masakit sa sakong o sa talampakan. Kung ikaw yong tipong maarte sa kaliit-liitang discomfort sa bawat paghakbang mo habang suot ang isinusukat na sapatos, maswerte na siguro ang saleslady na nag-aasist sayo kung hanggang dalawa o tatlong klase lang ng sapatos ang pinagpiliian mo hanggang sa makahanap ka ng magsa-swak sa taste mo at magbibigay ng komportableng pakiramdam sa paa mo. Maswerte ka kung sa pagka-maselan mo ay marami kang pagpipilian. There are times na … ang tagal mong maka-decide kasi yong sapatos na nagustuhan mo na sana ay last pair na pala. Iniisip mong hindi naman sulit na iyon na lang ang bibilhin mo kung bukod sa marami nang nagsukat no’n ay ni hindi naman sya naka- “sale”. Chances are … kung kailangan mo na talagang bumili ng sapatos at ayaw mo na parang second-hand lang ang bibilhin mo,  mauuwi ka sa choice na “just settle for less” -- ang mabibili mo ay ang sapatos na isa naman sa mga pinagpilian mo: fit naman sa size mo, pasok din naman sa taste mo, pero nagdadalawang-isip ka pa din – kasi parang ‘di sya masyadong “confi” sa pakiramdam. 

Discomforts!

We cannot decide to make even the right, if not the best choice -- kasi ang totoo, we don’t have the “will” to rule over our emotions.  We would tend to complain on the littlest details of discomfort while we make ourselves the only person who needs big amount of consideration. We cannot “influence” our own action because we’ve tolerated “uncooperative mind-set” – the evidence? … tayo mismo ang umaayaw sa sarili nating choice kasi meron tayong ibang “mas gusto”! – yet, kapag may nagka-interes sa bagay na di natin gaanong binigyang halaga, saka lang natin sinasabing “sayang, dapat pala…”!

It is for this tendency that in our Gospel for today,  Jesus warned John for what he did upon forbidding the man from casting out demons in Jesus’ name since what that man did was supposedly what the disciples should actually be doing to accomplish their purpose.

Most of the time, we are not aware that what we’ve been doing becomes our own stumbling block -- since while we lose the power to win over our human weaknesses, we even become the cause why others would also justify their inequities as influenced by us.

Bottomline, ang totoong “power”, parang nagsuot ka lang ng bagong sapatos, i-try kung kasya, ilakad-lakad, kung may kaunting discomfort pakirandaman lang muna kasi maaaring sa umpisa lang ganon!

Pero ang pinakatotoo, hindi naman ang sapatos ang point of adjustment kundi ang “discomfort” na napagtagumpayan mo sa panahon na inakala mong “no choice” ka na!   

The Power expected of us is to effect change to others when we inspire them with the dignity of our testimony while we strive to make our “walk” lead a life with Christ way ahead!  -- sunset

"True Character is who you are and what you do -- even when no one is watching you!"

Shall we not have the “mind of Christ” when Carpentry Matters?

Have you ever heard or came across this story “Work Like You Don’t Need the Money”?

An elderly carpenter was ready to retire.

He told his employer-contractor of his plans to leave the house-building business & live a more leisurely life with his wife& his extended family. He would miss the paycheck, but he needed to retire. They could get by.

The contractor was sorry to see his good worker go & asked if he could build just one more house 

as a personal favor.

The carpenter said yes, but in time it was easy to see that his heart was not in his work anymore. He resorted to shoddy workmanship & used inferior materials. It was an unfortunate way to end a dedicated career.

When the carpenter finished his work , the employer came to inspect the house. He handed the front-door key to the carpenter & said, "This is your house, my gift to you."

The carpenter was shocked!! What a shame!!  

If he had only known he was building his own house,                                                        he would have done it all so much differently.

Many times, life would bring us to situation/s which we do not understand as it happens. At times, we feel that situations would ask us to do things which we cannot determine “what it is for”.  Sometimes too, we would give that denying reaction: “why me”?

Sometimes, we are like this carpenter in real life. Because we feel that what we are asked to do is quite immaterial with what we want, we would resort to careless actions, putting less than our best into what we are doing; not minding much to strive to understand the things which we should value. The reactions that we give, just like Peter’s reaction in the Gospel Mark 8:27-35.

“The miracle of God requires the action of man!”, let us be pre-cautioned by the carpenter’s tendency in this story where his substandard actions brought him the shock that he will have to live in the house which he built so carelessly.

When as of yet, we do not understand what things are for, let us instead have “the mind of Christ”  while we are in the carpentry process: carry what it is that life is asking us to carry,  deny our self-intentions while DISCERNing what the Holy Spirit is urging us to do, and just keep on giving out our best while we hammer each nail to build the house that we want to enjoy living-in.

We might be carrying the cross which Jesus wants us to carry while denying ourselves of our human desires; yet, if we will set our mind to that of Christ’s, we will soon enjoy the abundance that has been reserved for us as “a gift”!  -- sunset

credits to thinkexist.com & heartwarmingstories.net for the lines                                                “Work like you don’t need the Money”

"True Character is who you are and what you do -- even when no one is watching you!"

Let’s also Start Crafting our OWN MASTERPIECE!

WE ARE GOD’S WORKMANSHIP! 

He brought us here for a purpose. 

We only need to unlock our uniqueness 

while combining the different colors – the various  experiences 

we’ve been through  which defines the person that we’ve become.

http://profgail67.wordpress.com/2013/05/29/lets-also-start-crafting-our-own-masterpiece/

"True Character is who you are and what you do -- even when no one is watching you!"

Move! ... the Simplest Solution!

All that it takes is for us to strive to manage
even when things are difficult.  

We are dead in sin and yet God comes to heal us ...

We are impatient, yet God reaches out to us! 

How would you like to be reminded that the Passion of Jesus Christ is to heal people?

However, how humbly would we recognize that the more God is reaching out to us, 

the more that we weave our way far from Him and even hide away to tolerate our guilt?

@ The Feast with Bro Jon Escoto, our dear Feast Builder,  I've just had a lot of realizations which I'd feel too bothered to just keep to myself. 

Several lines crashed in ... how merciful God is, that in Jeremiah 13:17 He faithfully assures: "I will give you back your health and heal the wound..." 

Vulnerable as we are, we tend to take care of the "hurts" which hinder us from enjoying our body as the TEMPLE of GOD. The more God intends to clean us up, the more that we allow ourselves to create clutters and the more that we give-in to our cravings, justifying that it's never really easy to change those habits which are already hard to break.

Sometimes we need to be reminded that "life is too short" to keep us MOVING just before it really ends. It's a natural tendency to complicate solutions when we are already pressed with time; but we thank God for this day that we are made to discover that The Simplest Solutions are the Healthiest Solutions! 

We only need to discover the secret of the fountain of youth: this so called "telomerase" which all of us have in our bodies -- an enzyme that re-forms chromosome ends and prevents the shortening that usually limits the number of replications.  

Simple Solutions? ... Bro Jon says that we make simple things complicated but as simple as things are, these three [3] Steps will increase "telomerase" in our body and the secret to increase health:

      Step 1:  Breathe 

      Step 2:  Exercise

      Step 3:  Sleep

BREATHE.  

A lot of people are sick of many things and because they don't breathe properly. 

Others are sick because they tend to do lazy breathing ...."hihinga na lang, tamad pa!"

The air in our body costs us nothing but it can heal us.

     There are Types of Breathing:

          1.  Upper chest breathing

          2.  Middle chest breathing

          3.  Abdominal breathing/diaphragm breathing.  

               How the "baby breathes" is the proper way :) 

What "real" breathing can do for you? Here are only some: 

1. You increase your blood & lymph circulation

2.  You detoxify your body

3.  You relax yourself

4.  You gain steady energy throughout the day

5.  You have great positive moods(s) 

EXERCISE.  

Best thing to start our day? We can do this Prayer Exercise during our Quiet Time with God.  This works best with Instrumental background music: 

     Inhale God's love; exhale mans stress

     Inhale God's power; exhale all fears

     Inhale God's overwhelming presence; exhale hatred

     Inhale God's healing; exhale sin and unforgiveness. 

Then, as Bro Jon jokes about, "Ano ang ginagawa mo pag wala kang ginagawa?" 

We should EXERCISE -- do Physical Exercise!!

We have to take note that we need 10 thousand steps of walking a day, for us to be able to exercise properly!  If we don't exercise, our joints and muscles become stiff -- and this is not actually a sign of aging! It aches because we are not using it properly. What we don't use, we lose! 1.5 % of our muscles break down because we don't use it capably. 

This bothers me: Our heart should normally beat at a required rate per minute as per studies; yet, because we don't exercise, we don't live up the rate we should -- and yes, it makes our body complain! 

We may consider these added research on its benefits if we don't really want to endure our own complaints:

1.  Exercise reduces our stress

2.  ... boosts  "happy chemicals"

3.  ... improves self-confidence

4.  ... alleviates anxiety

5.  ... increases "brain power"

6.  ... sharpens memory

7.  ... inspire others. 

SLEEP.

Sleep is not just down time.  When we sleep, our body actually works hard.  It is hard work -- for during sleep, the brain is creating memories and insights.  The body is recuperating & re-calibrating. When we sleep our body gathers hormones which fight diseases. 

This has been the habitual thing I normally deprive myself of, specially when I have long list of "things -to-do". But today, I just had to give myself some sort of reproaching while I can feel that Bro Jon's message strikes through me.  

And so yes, these Tips, I'll really have to take into account to give myself that BEST SLEEP ever: 

1.  Stick to a sleep schedule

2.  Sleep before midnight

3.  Avoid taking drinks with stimulants like coffee

4.  Don't eat large meals and meat at night specially after 8pm

5.  Avoid technology in your room

6.  No lights should be turned on while you sleep; the blacker it is, its better to the body

    The hormone called melatonin is not released if there is light in your eye lids which should          supposedly work with our biological clock by telling our brain when it is time to sleep. 

What struck me? When Bro Jon emphasized that: "the lack of proper sleep is the devil's way to keep us far from God!" The worries, guilt...pains and hurts of the past -- even of the day, which linger in our memory and which keep us awake because we still want to accomplish more, should all be lifted up to God by meditating and speaking with our Shepherd and enjoying our ACT of FAITH as we entrust NEW MORNINGS to God. 

Summing it up, no one will ever decide to MOVE ON with these healthy solutions than US. God has given us so much gift, the only part we should take is GRAB! -- then soon, prove our difference as God's Biggest Winner. :)

Credits to the following links for my added research: 

• http://www.ehow.com/how_5893303_healthy-telomeres.html
• http://www.smart-publications.com/articles/protect-your-chromosome-telomeres-naturally-by-encouraging-telomerase-
• http://www.modernmedicine.com/modern-medicine/news/modernmedicine/modern-medicine-news/lifestyle-changes-increase-telomerase-activ
• http://www.besthealthmag.ca/embrace-life/wellness/are-you-breathing-the-right-way
• http://www.amsa.org/healingthehealer/breathing.cfm
• http://www.breathing.com/articles/benefits.htm
• http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/03/27/mental-health-benefits-exercise_n_2956099.html#slide=806430
• http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/exercise/HQ01676
• http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/03/27/mental-health-benefits-exercise_n_2956099.html
• http://www.sparkpeople.com/blog/blog.asp?post=7_ways_to_sleep_better_tonight
• http://www.helpguide.org/life/sleeping.htm

My Insights & Reflections

The Biggest Winner Series @ The Feast Binan Central Mall

Talk 3. Move...The Simplest Solutions are the Healthiest Solutions

26 May 2013

"True Character is who you are and what you do -- even when no one is watching you!"